“My sexuality kind of developed in stages. I liked boys first, had crushes on boys first, and flirted with boys first.”
My sexuality kind of developed in stages. I liked boys first, had crushes on boys first, and flirted with boys first.
It was a fifth grade type of sexuality, when I started wearing a training bra and liking boys evolved naturally. The girls thing, as in my finding girls attractive, came about later.
For me, it was more physical in nature and it was linked to my own changing body. I think girls generally develop stereotypical attractive physical traits earlier than guys do.
For instance, I had breasts before most of my male friends had abs. It was confusing when I started liking girls because it didn’t make me like guys any less, which I realize now was a product of bisexual erasure. I remember literally wondering how it was possible for me to like both.
Coming out is definitely still an issue for people. I think this is because even with declining homophobia, being LGBTQ is still not the norm. Any deviation from being straight and cis gender is exactly that, a deviation.
Accepting a difference within yourself, whether it’s not liking peanut butter in third grade or it’s being attracted to more than one gender, is extremely hard. This is especially true in adolescence.
As a society, we need to dismantle the idea of the norm. There are so many variations within humanity that it’s crazy to try and put us into one or two boxes.
I’m still not comfortable revealing my sexual attraction to women. For me, it’s just part of who I am and I don’t feel like that’s anyone’s business, but my sexual partner.
I guess that’s counter to the new LGBTQ rights movement, which is all about celebration of your identity. Sometimes, I wish that celebration could be just a little more private.