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LGBTQ Voices

How I Became Passionate About Sex Positivity



A person eating a peach outside at a farmers market
Nyack, NY

I didn’t officially come out until I was in college. I didn’t tell my parents or start posting about it on social media until the winter of my freshman year.

Still, in high school, my vocal and unabashed support of shows like “Glee” was my way of expressing what I wasn’t ready to come out directly yet.

I feel like when “Glee” was popular and on the air, the LGBTQ+ representation was such a big deal. I remember in high school that liking “Glee” was reserved for kids who were openly queer, or straight girls.

When I did finally come out, I felt relieved that I didn’t have to live vicariously through other people’s stories anymore. I could be honest. Most of the people close to me basically already knew anyway.

Whether it’s homophobia or sexism, these forms of bigotry are rooted in the fear of the other. Specifically, homophobia has its roots in fear of one who is “different.”

We’ve spent so long trying to establish societal norms that any departure from them seems to threaten the whole system.

Sex positivity is something I’m really passionate about. And it’s closely tied to how I see my own sexual orientation.

I almost don’t agree with the idea of heterosexuality because I don’t know why that label is needed. I believe that sexuality is inherently fluid. I depart from the idea that sex is just for procreation.

Instead, I like to live my life with the idea that sex is also for pleasure. Whether it is the pleasure of having a child or just the joy of physically connecting with another human.

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